Archive for the ‘Drinkie Poo’ Category

Grand Coffee Is The Winningest

February 8, 2013

…at life. At coffee. At everything.

I think it’s really impressive how they are working overtime to ensure that they cater to underserved demographics:

hell yes you do, grand coffee.

hell yes you do, grand coffee.

Rumors of a silent partnership between Grand and Siegel’s Clothing have been going around the Mish. Why? Because pimps love coffee. That’s why.

we f*cking love coffee. obv.

we f*cking love coffee. obv.

Another reason Grand is the best? Their dedication to bringing talented artists some limelight. From in-store art installations to give-aways of previously owned copies of Dumb and Dumber, the Grand crew is taking the Mish art scene to new levels:

HURRY! it's filling up!

HURRY! it’s filling up!

I’m entering to win. I’ve been digging through piles of street trash for months looking for a previously-owned copy of Dumb and Dumber. Thank you, Grand, for yet another opportunity to experience greatness.

KRUA = Suck A$$ Club

December 6, 2011

Oh em gee, Mish-Fish, we are back and… WTF? There are approximately 7 jillion new restaurants blowing up the ‘hood, people with bad clothes are happier than ever, and you still can’t wear red past Cesar Chavez.

Robby and I decided to dive into some Mission mayhem this weekend, so we went to check out the new nightclub, KRUA (just a stroll away at 16th and Guerrero.) Apparently this used to be some lame-ass Thai resto, but we heard that the owners got hip to the needs of the neighbs.  They are def gunning to be the next A1A Steak Lounge.  Natch.

Image

Xanax does NOT REQUIRE SILVERWARE, PPL. ( I can't sit down in this dress ne way.)

Geared up for some srs J-Pop, I decked out in my best six inch sling-backs + tiny tube shirt-dress, picked up Mr. Aberdeen (crucial accessory) and started getting crazy sloppy on those whiskey-filled chocolate balls. (It’s XMAS BIA!) When we got to KRUA, though, I was all “Where’s the line?” For reals, people, there were approximately negative five humans in the place. Maybe has something to do with the fact that they are totes crowding the dance floor w/ weird-ass tables. (Or weird ass-tables?)  Oh and NO LIQUOR? WTF? How am I supposed to get crunk and make out with hella strangerz?

Verdict: KRUA Thai is NOT where the party is at.  Unless you are into free ice water and cracking your shins on aluminum chairs while you get your freak on.

Don’t spill the wine, bro [video]!

October 26, 2010

These buddies were just chilling in the DP with the regular gang when calamity occurred.

I hope this didn’t ruin their friendship.

Breaking: Breakfast Bonanza

August 15, 2010

If there is one thing we are all about, it’s breakfast.  The Mish has no shortage of options and we take advantage like it’s our job.

However, this weekend we discovered that changes are afoot in the Breakfast World of the Mish. Hold on to your Topsiders – We have some serious updates, right here and right now.

1)  Punjab Breakfast – FREE MIMOSAS, YA’LL!  Though this place is most commonly known for serving up a mean plate of lo mein, they will hook you up with a baller all-American breakfast that will blow your Mish Mind.  (Photo evidence below.)  We walked in looking for matar paneer, found out it was actually a Chinese restaurant, and then got the hook up on the omelette menu.  WHAT?! They open at ten a.m. and if you order off the breakfast list, mimosas are on the house.

Lobster omelette? Yes, please.

Oh, and did we mention everything comes with like, seven side dishes (plus lonely strawberry garnish?)  Prices comparable to The Fountain.

2) THE FOUNTAIN – Twice the rad, half the wait!

That’s right, your favorite fashion-forward crowded-ass diner took over the lingerie store next door, opening up more seating than you shake a stick at.  We haven’t figured out yet how the waiters are getting back and forth between the “main hall” and “the annex” (as a co-eater described them) but I only had time to smoke one Parliament while waiting for a table, as opposed to the usual three.  NICE.

Changes are afoot. We like 'em.

Their menu also has a few new items, including a vegan version of The Nebulous Potato Thing.  The mimosas aren’t free here,  but the waiter ‘tudes will really help kickstart your day.

3)  NENA’s  (Mission and Cortland) – Don’t try to get breakfast here.  Something has gone terribly awry and breakfast is only available Monday through Friday.  (I know. I don’t get it either.)  Their yogurt parfait sounds great.  But we wouldn’t know. It was Saturday and they wouldn’t give it to us. LAME.

We hope your hang-overs find this information useful and wish all the brunch-munchers great success.  Good luck out there.

Armstrong out.

Carnaval in the Mish! What? What!

June 7, 2010

Last weekend, Alice and I were unexpectedly bombarded with cultures up the whoa.  It was crazy rad.  Here’s a little photolog of some of the events and scenery we peeped on Sunday morn/afternoon.

Delivery Truck Float - Comes with attached femalez.

There was a parade busting through the Mish.  I’m not sure when it started, but it lasted forever.  There were hella floats and mad peeps in colorful feathers shaking their booties in various rhythms.

And who knew there were so many dance-fighting troupes in San Francisco?  Props to the elderly dancers and dance-fighters keeping it real.

This mullet is completely unironic.

The crowd was pretty eclectic.  See haircut above.  Legit.

Some pirates looking for booty. They should have hooked up with the Delivery Truck Float.

On Harrison Street, there was a potentially related street fair featuring meat, meat and meat galore.  And just when Alice and I thought everyone in the Mish was totes over the whole carnivore thing!  Way to keep us guessing, ‘hood!

I made sure to buy myself a few wolf shirts at one of the boutique fashion stands.  There was a large stage, a medium stage and one garage with live music of the following genres: Funk, Little Kids Rapping and Screamo.  Sick.

Alice loves this band. Especially the way the singer kept wrapping the mic cord around his neck. "Screamo's back? It's NOOSE to me!"

There was even some action outside the metal-detector protected boundaries of the street fair.  All around the ‘hood there were many people (“hipsters?”)  displaying some brightly colored and shiny cars.  Party on 21st St, and everyone was invited!

This little pink car looks like a lemon.

Back on Mission Street, it was a car-free affair.  I hope you already stocked up on some children’s pimp outfits – The joint is now closed.

It's a sad sad day for tiny child pimps.

After all the insanity, everyone left the Mish and lounged away in the sun at the very lovely DP.

Hey, isn't that the guy from La Corneta?

All things considered, we had a fun day in the Mish, with no stabbings or pies to the face.

Latin American Club For The Win

April 26, 2010

So this Saturday, I had the great pleasure of whiling away my hours at the Latin American Club!

What:  Cutest little “dive-bar-masquerading-as-chic-venue” ever.  Don’t be confused by the twinkle lights and the well-dressed thirty-somethings smoking expensive cigarettes out front.  The dusty taxidermy behind the bar will remind you that yes, you are in fact home, drinking in another of the great and gritty Mish dives.

Where:  22nd and Valencia.  Far enough from Mission Bar to make you feel fancy, but close enough to drunk food to keep your ‘tude in check.

That horse is about to be wicked tanked.

Why:  The bartenders are hella rad.  I mean, yeah, they look pissed when you order your $8 Margarita of Doom (this shit will have you passed out on Market St. in no time!)  But that’s just part of the L.A. love… Nothing says “Drink More Tequila” like an aggro eye-roll as you slap down your tip!

Also, this is a great place to commune with your fellow Mish-dwellers.  Everyone here is spinning a super positive vibe… as long as you don’t knock elbows in the throng.  Oh, and be sure to get on the crazy-secret Waiting List for a table by the door, just to make things legit.   Talk to the bearded door guy, he’ll hook you up and keep you from getting your clock cleaned by a stilleto-ed cougar with a penchant for snacking on innocent revelers.

To conclude, I urge you to watch yo’ back out front, ya’ll – There’s a moat of broken glass that grows on the sidewalk periodically, but that’s just to make you feel like you’ve earned the right to drink mad ‘ritas with the best of the best.

MISH LOVE!

Armstrong out.

Back Home in the Mish (And Winners of Our Competish!)

March 9, 2010

OMG I am so happy to be back home in the Mish!  I was reading this great novel by literary juggernaut Nicholas Sparks and it really made me think of how much I love my new ‘hood:

The reason it hurts so much to separate is because our souls are connected.”  ~Nicholas Sparks, The Notebook

The Midwest?  NOT sick.  I do not hella heart it.  Not once was I offered a bacon-wrapped anything.  Not once did I translate the name of my dinner to learn I was eating goat spleen.  My tight new Community Thrift tees not only went unnoticed, but were often sneered at.  No matter how crazy-loud I cranked my Richard Wakeman iTunez, I could only think of getting back to Glooncy’s for Budweisers and a sticky round of Trivial Pursuit.

Lookin' smart, Glooncy's!

One thing was, for real, on my mind the whole time: WHO should win the first ever Mish Competish?  The answer came to me in this ridic dream (right after the part where I was at a poetry slam @ the 16th St. Bart Station):

Liz Dunn For The Win!

This was sixteen flavors of hilar, Lizzie D.  Send me an email (alicearmstrongstrong at gmail dot com) letting me know how epic you want your OMG the Mish! t-shirt.

MISH LOVE!

South End Grill ‘n’ Bar: Pabst and Turf?

February 23, 2010

On the corner of Valencia and 26th (street, not avenue), there is a pretty classy little restaurant called the “South End Grill ‘n’ Bar.”  I think the name is a reference to Boston because there’s a clover on the bar across the street, or maybe because it’s south of Market street?

In any case, this place didn’t look too busy last night.  I was tempted to go in just so I could chow down on a $20 steak while drinking a $1.75 beer.  Worth it?  Might have been.  Pair that beer with their $3 quesadillas, and you really have something!

I learned this pairing at sommelier school

Late Night Puns (And Veggie Burgers) For All!

February 23, 2010

There is one urge I consistently feel after a long night of libations in The Mish:  the need for a $15, awesomely complicated veggie burger that is too large for my mouth.

The Mish really does make dreams come true.  Urbun Burger (17th and Valencia) has stepped up to the plate:

Speak again, bright angel?!

I do have some questions, though, Urbun Burger… One of your super burger flippers was taking a sidewalk break with a pack o’ Parliament Lights, and his company schwag all seemed to be misspelled.  In fact, the giant logo on his t-shirt read, “URBAN BURGER.”

DISAPPEARING PUNS? I don’t know what to think.

Gestalt Haus: Wicked Cool

February 22, 2010

Snap that tap! (get 'em!)

This place is great, and I’m so glad I found it.  It’s a few doors down from our fave movie destination, The Roxie.  Just look for the pool table and the be-geared “Gestalt” logo.  When you get there, plunk yourself down on a bar stool and order a beefy (OR VEGAN!)  sausage and a fancy beer.  If you are riding your bike, no problem!  There are some bike-hooks on the wall that are rarely used, so hang-er-up and enjoy!

The bartenders are not to be trifled with, so be sure to tip.  I saw a beefy bartender rip the metal handle right off the Napa Smith Pale Ale tap, spraying delicious beer everywhere.  The Napa is RIP until they either get a welder or a decent bike mechanic to fix that tap.  So if you’re in the mood for a pale, try the Sierra Nevada… mmmm.

One awesome perk of Gestalt: above the bar TVs.  Not a fan of Olympic hockey?  No problem!  Just avoid tilting your head upwards!  When the game is over, the TVs are turned off.

It's the orange that makes it

The art on the wall is pretty sweet, and affordable, too!  After a couple liters of Leffe, I was almost ready to fork over  the shillings for one of those beautiful fabric silhouette pieces.

The single unisex bathroom boasts some really fantastic design.  You can tell a lot of thought and effort was put into giving this a “dirty south dive bar” kind of feel.  And the whole “Bring Your Own TP” thing is a nice touch, too.  Well done!

Real "Dirty South"


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